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I have various quibbles with this topic, which he and I have discussed many times.
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(A LOT lot.) It still seems like an insult to my friends who are widowed men (who are frequently outraged by these blogs) to admit that there is something there... Perhaps men are more frequently bad daters, overall? There is certainly scads and scads of material about dating divorced men...) I've always wanted to do a comparison that went beyond "my husband didn't WANT to leave me." Abel has just published a huge list justifying why this is a legitimate area... Often the ex-wife has been cut out of the family photos and pictures are spookily absent. We both do it, too, but again, most of the time, we do it gently and usually we're talking about behavior and not, say, waist size. I believe however that new partners benefit from displays of love like this....some of the ways that widowers behave badly in the dating market. Sometimes this means there are no pictures of the kids, either, or that the divorce lives in hotel-room-like impersonal environment. It is hard to avoid, but "constantly" would piss anybody off. not to mention tourists: the Taj Mahal was built to remember the Shah's late wife.Both widowed and divorced men should be able to talk about people in their past without cartoonish characterizations. Okay that is pretty weird, but isn't it a question of theology, like, are you healed when you get to heaven? (I only managed to find one widower when I was dating.It didn't go well, but it had nothing to do with his loss.) So I tend to wonder, why is there no comparable community (and books) for those dating widowed WOMEN,given that they are 7/8ths of the widowed population?