Not all these things are true of every church- I’ve been in some great ones actually and am not writing this post to bash the IFBs- but these are the things that make the IFBs infamous).I learned a lot of unhealthy things in IFB churches.Sex happens: My parents kind of failed when it came to teaching me about sex growing up. Then my mom awkwardly said something like, “You know how all that sex stuff works, right? I was shocked when I came home from college one summer, went shopping with my mom and she said, “Do you need me to buy you any condoms? But, since then, we’ve been able to talk about the subject with each other. I’m glad my mother was aware of the reality that, hey, people have sex.I’m glad that my mother wants me to know how to be safe if I do have sex. Every woman should learn to be independent: I’m not sure if my mother could be considered an egalitarian (though she sure as heck will stand up to my father if she thinks he’s wrong- and I think he appreciates that about her).She is constantly reminding people that a woman breast-feeding her baby was once a popular subject for artists to paint. Because it’s She also taught me modesty- not because she thought I should “make sure my brothers in Christ don’t stumble.” No, she taught me modesty because she wanted me to respect myself and appreciate my body as my own (as opposed to belonging to any man).She was never legalistic about the subject, and as I grew older, she let me decide for myself what “modest” was. But my mother has more than made up for that mistake in recent years.Jesus is the only mediator between God and man, and only Jesus saves from sin.
Because even if you become a stay-at-home mom, you need a back up plan.”She is always telling me, “You could marry the greatest guy in the world.
And since my parents chose to attend those churches, I always thought they believed the same things.
But, looking back, my mother has almost always been a source of truth in my life (as I’ve shared before).
Children, elderly, homeless, abusive men, abused women, divorcees, teenagers, preachers, gay people, Muslims, …I mean, really.
You wouldn’t believe the insight this woman can have sometimes. Empathy doesn’t come naturally to me- I have to work hard to understand people. She respected my questioning, and added her own (I actually learned that she doesn’t believe in the “traditional” ideas about hell which was surprising). Rob Bell could have written a book about our conversation.